How to Take a Break in a Relationship and Make the Best Out of It
26.02.2020
Some couples, having reached a deadlock in their relationship, decide to take a break, in other words, spend some time without each other. This helps someone – they rest from each other and consider the possibility of continuing the relationship. Others understand that the relationship can’t be returned, and it is time to put an end to it.
It is also worth knowing that psychologists consider a relationship break an easy way to break up. That is, one partner just can’t say that he or she no longer experiences love, and the lion’s share of pauses in relationships happens precisely due to this reason. Can taking a break from a relationship help? Let’s figure it out!
Taking a Break in a Relationship Vs. Breaking Up
Well, when you break up with a woman (on your, her or a joint initiative), you are not going to continue the relationship. It is over. Perhaps you may stay friends, but your relationship (as a couple) is already finished. You don’t want to be with this person anymore (you don’t even want to keep dating online). But what does taking a break mean in a relationship? First of all, it is often limited to a certain time, for example, one week or a month. At the same time, it is expected that each of the partners will seriously think about whether they can change something or it is better to finish the relationship. This is not forever. This is the time to think about the situation in a relationship.
Taking a break in a relationship, rules of the relationship don’t change. You just don’t see each other for some time. You and your woman have time to think about whether you want to be together. But it doesn’t mean that you can look for other partners during this time, and moreover, have sex with everyone you want. People neither deceive nor cheat on each other. They remain constant romantic partners but with a temporary minimum contact.
When this time comes to an end, couples can meet and discuss everything together. If they are ready to stay together, then they continue dating. If not, then there is a final separation.
What to Do on a Relationship Break?
So, the decision is to have a break. Thank God, you don’t have to handle a breakup yet, but the break is also an equally difficult time both for the party that has made this decision and for the one that has faced the fact. Taking a break from a relationship to find yourself and survive a difficult period, first of all, you must control your emotions. The best thing you can do is to go about your business, don’t disturb your girlfriend until the end of the agreed period or until she gets in touch.
Don’t manipulate. This behavior will push away and cause a negative. Remember that the woman doesn’t belong to you, this is not your property, and she can do whatever she wants.
Clarify how to behave and whether it is possible to communicate. If so, then conversations should be unobtrusive, easy and friendly. You can’t break into claims, finding out who is right and who is to blame. Talk heart-to-heart. If this is not possible, you need to wait and discuss everything when the emotions subside.
Taking a break from a relationship, you don’t have to hurry to prove love and devotion to your partner, but you also don’t need to completely close in yourself. Maintain neutral communication, don’t perceive what has happened as the end of the world. For you, a break in the relationship is a possible reboot and the road to a new stage.
When Is It the Best Situation to Take a Relationship Break?
Relationships are sometimes compared to a roller coaster. They can be characterized by ups and downs, weeks of boundless happiness and days of silent apathy. At the very beginning, lovers don’t hesitate to show the whole depth of their feelings, get used to each other’s habits. After some time, when the brightness of feelings disappears, the crisis is possible between partners. A relationship begins to annoy them, the first quarrels occur, there may be doubts about the sincerity of feelings and dissatisfaction with the behavior of the soulmate. Psychologists argue that the idea of a possible break in a relationship can appear under the influence of the following factors.
1. The disappearance of romance
This sounds oddly enough, but men also like the initial stage of a love story, when passion flashes between representatives of opposite sexes. However, gray everyday life can dampen the ardor in any way. Over time, one of the partners (in some cases, both) has a desire to temporarily stop the relationship that has begun. This need is argued to keep in touch by resting from each other for the good of both.
2. Uncertainty in a partner
Should I take a break from my relationship? Yes, if you are not sure of your partner. Not every person fully relies on their loved ones because there are no perfect people. Their support is very important to us, but sometimes, in a difficult situation, bitter disappointment from the inaction of others whom we trust comes. In addition, the partner may be unfaithful, which doesn’t strengthen the existing relationship. As a result, there is a desire to temporarily isolate oneself from the person’s inconsistent feelings to understand the current situation.
3. Quarrels over trifles
At the beginning of relationships, lovers turn a blind eye to many things. They try to ignore some bad habits of partners. After many years of being together, quarrels begin from scratch. But the inability to resolve conflicts calmly and the accumulation of claims lead to the desire to break up sooner or later. So, does taking a break from a relationship help? Sometimes it does, when a breakup is anyway close.
4. New love
In other words, it is treason. Even if a man or a woman has not yet found a new lover, but coldness, indifference, arrogance appeared in the relationship, then it is worth considering whether a partner has someone else. Treason can be both physical and emotional. Emotional betrayal shouldn’t be underestimated. If people have one-time sex and don’t intend to leave their partners, this can be overcome. But if they fell in love with another person, but there was no physical closeness yet, then this is much worse.
Rules of Taking a Break in Relationships
Human relationships have a complex mechanism. They can quickly and rapidly develop, last many years, survive crisis moments, and also break slowly and painfully. In any case, it is difficult to understand the psychology of relationships for an ordinary person. What can and can’t be done if you decide to take a break in a relationship with a partner? These tips will tell you how not to destroy what is already in a state of crisis.
1. Decide what you want
The first thing to do is to decide what you want from the pause. This is one of the most important taking a break in a relationship rules. It can be a complete break or “reset” of the relationship. Depending on this, you will have to choose a further methodology of behavior. If you ask for a pause because you can’t break up completely and take on this responsibility, just keep in mind that you need to end the relationship and not delay the inevitable difficult conversation.
2. Prepare your partner in advance
Try to give your woman excellent examples of how your friends took a break in a relationship, and then again make up with renewed vigor and full of inspiration. Tell her about your people who were forced to leave for different cities, but when they met again, they realized that this was fate and such a person shouldn’t be lost. Offer your woman to break for a certain period but promise that you will be together again after the expiration of the period.
3. Start a conversation when she is in a good mood
If you start telling your loved one about the need for a pause in the relationship at the time of the quarrel, then it is likely that she will say that it is better to break up at all. Try to find the right moment, speak calmly and smile. Try to make your offer look as reasonable and rational as possible. Don’t scream or try to provide a lot of arguments. Just explain that it will be better for both of you.
4. Formulate your phrases correctly
How to take a break in a relationship? Your loved one shouldn’t perceive a pause in a relationship as the need to leave forever. Say that you want to do your favorite hobby, devote time to your family or go visit friends. Tell her that you will be together again, it is only important to wait a while to be sure that you love and need each other.
5. Come to an understanding
Make sure that you and your partner have common views on understanding the term “a break in a relationship.” Find out what this means for your soulmate. Discuss important issues in advance. For example, will you communicate with each other during a pause, will you go to a family therapist, will you flirt and have intimate relationships with other people? All this is extremely important.
6. Don’t let your emotions take hold of you
If you start getting hysterical, then you will only spoil everything. You must let your loved one understand that her decision is important to you, and you agree to simply wait out the difficult moment in your relationship. A person who knows how to calmly accept such news is respected. There is a desire to return faster because the last meeting is not overshadowed by hysterics and bad words. This is how to take a break from relationships correctly.
7. Take everything from it
A break in a relationship is a time that can’t be fully planned. You must relax and get everything you can from “freedom” (but in a reasonable amount). People learn from their own experiences. Have you been in a relationship and felt that something is wrong? Take a break and plunge into single life.
Make sure that after resuming the relationship, you will not regret the missed chance to try something new and realize some of your dreams.
Psychologists believe that a break happens after a quarrel, a surge of emotions. Everything happens naturally. When one of the partners says that it is time to take a break, there is nothing good in this (although there are exceptions to all the rules). It is possible that both are tired of each other and want to rest. Is taking a break in a relationship good? Well, there are exemplary stories when people take a break in a relationship, and everything ends well. They pacify pride, show a sincere intention and determination to change. They clarify for themselves that their partners are really dear to them. If it is still impossible to reach an agreement, then the time has come for a breakup, and life has prepared something new. Just thank your partner for the experience and pleasant moments.
