What is Chivalry in Dating and How to Take Advantage of It
17.11.2017
In modern society, when women are almost equal to men, it is very difficult for gentlemen to fulfill their male obligations. What actions should a real man take towards a loved one? It is very difficult to formulate the answer to this question correctly because each has its own character, principles, views on life, etc. But one thing is known for sure – a real man shouldn’t be afraid to show his feelings, treat and care for a loved one. If a man boldly and openly talks about his feelings, then he is confident in himself and this is the manifestation of a real masculine character.
What is chivalry and what to do with it?
What does chivalry mean? For some, it is just good manners; for some, it is a way of seduction or an integral part of the attitude towards a woman. Each of us has own understanding of the word “chivalry”. But I think everyone agrees that chivalry is, above all, good manners, tact, and courtesy. In this age of gender equality, chivalry has become almost anachronistic, but it still has high value among real men and women. So, do we need chivalry and why does it gradually disappear from our daily life? What was the code of chivalry? This concept was born in France and in translation from French it means extreme courtesy or exquisite courtesy. In the 17th and 18th centuries, chivalry implied a kind of “service” to a lady, worshiping her beauty and fulfilling all her desires and whims.
How many times have you heard from your girlfriend such words: “You’re not romantic, you don’t pay attention to me at all, you don’t even say that you miss me.” Yeah, every time is the same. And what did you answer? Well, most likely, you tried to calm your loved one and said that she just understood everything wrong and you really missed her but just had no time. So, why do girls sometimes become unbearable and begin to come up with all kinds of nonsense (as it seems to men)? Women just don’t have enough of your attention, and they want to see and feel what they really need. And most often all they need from you is chivalry. Yes, yes. Only the strong and courageous who are ready to come to the rescue at the right time can interest girls. They want to be just happy with you. If there is any attraction between a guy and a girl, chivalry will only warm up a relationship, it’s a kind of interesting game. Even if you both are in a long and lasting relationship, chivalry will renew your feelings and improve your relationship.
What is chivalry today?
What happened to chivalry today? Those who believe that chivalry is doomed to extinction are not right. Chivalry is inseparably connected with such quality as well-being in the period of acquaintance and is a kind of visiting card. For those who are already in a long relationship, mutual courtesy and politeness help avoid routine, increase sympathy and desire to be together. Men can complain, as much as they want, about the mad rhythm of modern life, which supposedly doesn’t allow them to be gallant and courteous. But, anyway, men have to be gallant with women despite all the excuses. Women become even more feminine and attractive in response! Being gallant, a man with pleasure for himself sees how his woman literally “blossoms”. Such a wonderful metamorphosis adds self-confidence and improves mood.
No one will eradicate a natural inclination of men to be women’s protectors, take care of them, forgive weaknesses and tolerate their emotionality. So chivalry, of course, is needed for both men and women, and it is simply profitable to be gallant in some sense!
How to take advantage of chivalry in dating
A guy can easily learn how to be chivalrous with his girlfriend. All it takes is a little practice and the desire to make your life better. Desire is the most important part of the task if you want to be chivalrous, men. But, unfortunately, not many guys are ready to change something in their life so that their soul mates become happy. Most guys take the position of “love me or leave me” every time or are too stubborn to admit that they make a mistake and are wrong with such behavior. In our time, most girls will not tolerate such an attitude towards themselves. Modern girls are very picky about guys, and already know to whom they should say “Yes” and to whom “No”. Any guy, who wants to be in a relationship with a woman, has to follow particular rules to be a good man for her. Fortunately, there are still guys who want to change so that their relationship with their loved ones becomes even better. These guys take the whole initiative, and, in the end, receive awards from their girlfriends.
How to be chivalrous
Both a guy and a girl will benefit from chivalry. A guy, who spends his time on making his loved one better, can build a strong relationship. A girl, who appreciates this, most likely, loves a guy even stronger. So, here are examples of chivalry that can help reach such relationships:
1. Say compliments
If you don’t know how to show chivalry, then you can start with compliments, for example. If your girl looks great, let her know about it. Many men look at their wives or girlfriends and think how beautiful they are, but they never tell them about it. They think that women already know this, so they don’t see the need to repeat it again and again. But it is necessary to understand that a woman will never get tired of hearing compliments. The uncertainty of a woman in herself may never completely disappear, so your sincere and frequent compliments will help her cope with this feeling.
2. Never look at other women when your lady is nearby
It is quite natural for men to look at other attractive women. Wise women understand this. However, men should be able to keep these impulses under control. If you have lunch with your girlfriend and she notices how you look at another attractive girl, she can understand that this is a normal man’s trait but she still has the thought: “He wants me to look like her.” If your lady knows that all your attention belongs only to her, she will feel more confident.
3. Hold her hand
If you take a girlfriend by the hand even without any apparent reason, she will feel your deep connection and the fact that you appreciate her love. It means warmth and protection, and that she is your the only one. This is how chivalry in dating should look like.
4. Bring her breakfast
Bring her coffee or tea in bed in the morning. It is not necessary to enter a room on horseback, but it is important to indulge her this way as often as possible.
5. Be always polite
In modern-day chivalry, many men forget about knightly behavior and put themselves first, forgetting to think about the needs of their girlfriends. They don’t say “please” and “thank you” but raise their voices, and so on. Remove everything that distracts you when you eat together (it’s more important than answering a phone call). Demonstrate clearly that a relationship is in the first place. Believe me, chivalry sets a mood and it always returns a hundredfold.
6. Don’t pester a girl
A man shouldn’t do it even in the case when he is a real dream of a girl. It is not necessary to go over people and constantly try to “jump above your head.” Constant compliments, dinners at restaurants, entertainment centers, movies, and touching stories are good, but this situation can make a lady bored. Let a lady feel your good attitude, but don’t pamper her too much.
A wonderful option is the gradual disclosure of your talents to a girl. Let her know you better with the time. Some mystery and understatement gives a relationship some romance and certainly don’t let her get bored. If you don’t have some special talent, you can always raise your educational level and learn a few romantic poems, for example. It also can be considered as acts of chivalry.
You can be an athlete, an artist, or a dancer – it doesn’t matter, but if a girl finds out all the “sides” of your essence on the first date, she will cease to be surprised by anything in time, and maybe even feel incomplete in comparison with such a handsome knight.
7. Let her know that you admire her
Of course, you don’t need to praise and compliment her every minute, but you can emphasize how slender her figure is or that her appearance is wonderful and all of her is so positive. In general, say what attracts you and what you appreciate her for. Do you know how such moments are important to them? Let her take these advantages of chivalry in dating.
8. Prepare small surprises for her
You can’t even imagine how they love it. And it doesn’t matter how long you are together: every girl likes surprises. A small teddy bear, a flower, a beautiful postcard is exquisite and simple, so give it to her from time to time. This is exactly how to be a gentleman to a lady in a relationship.
9. Don’t cheat
Become a wonderful lover. Try to bring as much pleasure as possible to your girlfriend. Now many Slavic and Chinese techniques are known for mastering sexual potential.
In the “gallant age” the highest degree of worship and admiration was demonstrated to a woman. To offer assistance to a woman, to give a hand, to help with a coat, to move a chair, to open the door graciously, to pick up a dropped thing – this chivalrous behavior was absolutely natural for men.
Of course, our modern etiquette has also largely inherited the principle of gallant attitude towards a woman. But now the canons of chivalrous behavior are strictly observed only in diplomatic and conservative circles, where great importance is accorded to a high level of communication. And if we are less likely to face chivalry in everyday life, the reason for this is the lack of proper information in a family and at school. Of course, women’s emancipation, which doesn’t imply any chivalry, is also to blame in many ways. Many women believe that men, who show gallantry, communicate with them not on an equal footing. And some take male gallantry for the manifestation of love. This opinion is erroneous. First of all, chivalry is a culture of behavior and it is important not only when you are at some important meeting, but also in everyday life.
Love your girlfriend and prove to her that chivalry is not dead. This is what women expect from men. Be sincere with them. After all, the closeness of souls is most important and every girl dreams about it. Love them for who they are and don’t forget about chivalrous acts. Thus, you will make them the happiest.
